Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Wallet Chains

Wallet chains are one of the few inventions that have graced my generation to have only benefits and no downsides, however this is completely without taking coolness into consideration. A wallet chain provided a safe and easy way for a person to make sure that their wallet was secured safely to their sides at all times. It prevented anyone from just snatching your wallet and running. The only way you could possibly be pick pocketed was to have someone physically stand there and  empty your wallet, and if this happened then perhaps you deserved to be robbed.
The length and kind of chain that the wallet was attached to was super important, and ultimately made the final decision on whether a person was actually hip, or just a poser. These are the three simple rules every teenager should (or should have) follow to make sure that their wallet chain is hip:
1. The longer the better
2. The spikier the better
3. Don't be caught dead without one
 
How could such a useful invention dwindle its way out of style? The answer is beyond me. With the 2000's appently came a decrease in pickpocketings because if you are wearing a wallet chain now you are either a biker, or dont watch t.v.

Bull Cuts (Bowl Cuts)

Bull cuts were one of the great innovations that the 1990's brought my generation. Having a bull cut was a staple for any teenage boy who wanted to be cool. The hairdo meant that you were a bit rebellious because there is no way anyones parents appreciated their child having the lower half of their head shaved. If you dyed your bullcut blonde on the top then this made you twice as cool. If that blonde bullcut happened to be parted in the front then you were a bullcut god. Musical great Nick Carter, of the Backstreet Boys, and actor Leonardo DiCaprio were the innovators of this look. Since Carter and DiCaprio were both rich, famous, and every girl loved them; it was every teenage boys dream to copy this look.
The way that the "bowl" was cut into your head was an iffy subject though, too much bull and not enough cut really left a kid with a brutal haircut. The key was to have your head shaved about an inch and a half above your ears, anymore or any less could result in a poor haircut. There was nothing worse than that kid that everyone knew who looked like he had a mop on his head.
Another great thing about the bullcut was how low maitenance it was. Since the bottom half of the head would be shaved, only half of the head needed to be taken care of.
How did bullcuts possibly become uncool with all of these obvious advantages? I'm pretty sure nobody knows the answer to that one. It probably came with the demise of the Backstreet Boys and Leonardo DiCaprio, but hopefully just like all fads it will make its return. Personally, that return of awesomeness cannot come soon enough. Who wouldnt want a little party on the top, while still maintaining a proffesional buisness appropriate haircut on the bottom?
I think the biggest question that should be asked about this legendary hairstyle is how did it actually become cool? Who decided one day to shave the lower portion of their head? How did parents let this happen?